The Weight of Motherhood

By Karen Isbell

On March 14, eight pounds, three ounces changed my world. As mothers day approached, I reflected on these first 8 weeks of motherhood. One word resonates in my heart: overwhelming

Overwhelming love

Overwhelming joy

Overwhelming gratitude

Overwhelming fear

Overwhelming weight

Being a mother has given me but a glimpse at the love the Father has lavished on us, and my love for her grows deeper daily.

Now, nearly 11 pounds and 24 inches, she has brought us inexpressible joy and lots of pink!

I am so grateful for her and her health as we have walked with many who have and are grieving the loss of a little one and desire so deeply to be parents

My heart is fearful to lose her, fearful to disappoint her, fearful to fail her

The weight of motherhood is one I cannot carry without my Savior.

I will love her imperfectly without His love.

There will be days when the frustration will overshadow the joy without His joy.

There will be moments I forget to be grateful without His mercy to remind me of my own need.

There will always be the temptation to fear without His peace. 

Our, mine and Ellie’s, relationship is flawed, because she and I are both flawed, in desperate need of grace.

I will mess up. I will need forgiveness. I will need grace, daily.

And so the journey has begun. She and I will sharpen one another as we do this mother/daughter thing.

I am honored to give her a glimpse of the Father’s unconditional love and extend grace to her. I look forward to the day, when she understands and receives grace and can extend it back to me.

The weight of motherhood is beautiful.

The weight of motherhood is an honor.

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